


Digging For Dirt and Stealing Some Smalls Along the Way

by danceswithhamsters01



Series: Reddit Prompts [68]
Category: Dragon Age (Video Games), Dragon Age: Origins, Dragon Age: Origins - Awakening
Genre: Blackmail, Cat Burglars, Dialogue Heavy, Gen, Silly
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-09-08
Updated: 2019-09-08
Packaged: 2020-11-02 00:58:03
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 699
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20567765
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/danceswithhamsters01/pseuds/danceswithhamsters01
Summary: Based on a prompt from r/dragonage.Nathaniel Howe and Sigrun are prowling the city at night on a mission. Sigrun makes certain to have a little fun while they work. A Chantry board is involved.





	Digging For Dirt and Stealing Some Smalls Along the Way

**Prompt 6:** [_Visual Prompt_]([https://i.pinimg.com/564x/61/c9/6c/61c96ca4dc9ffa9464ff024c6b265b36.jpg](https://i.pinimg.com/564x/61/c9/6c/61c96ca4dc9ffa9464ff024c6b265b36.jpg))

* * *

A giggle slipped loose and flew out her throat. He leveled a nonplussed look her way.

“Laughter isn’t stealthy. Do you _want_ us to get caught?” he hissed.

“Such a party pooper. You always have such a serious look on your face; it can’t be healthy,” the tattooed dwarven woman replied to her much taller companion.

“We aren’t here to attend a party,” Nathaniel said with a shake of his head. “We’re here to gather information on enemies.”

Sigrun stuck her tongue out, blowing a raspberry. “Got to take your fun where you can find it.”

“I fail to see what is so fun about having stolen the bann’s smallclothes.”

“I’m going to nail them to the Chanter’s board by the Chantry,” the smaller Warden smirked, eyes twinkling with glee.

“Maker’s breath! Who on earth gave you that idea?!”

“The Commander’s friend told me a story where that happened. I can’t wait to see the priests’ faces.” Sigrun bounced on her feet.

Nathaniel sighed, finding one of his palms covering his face. “Does the Commander have any friends who are _good_ influences? Wait, forget I even asked that. The woman married a man hired to kill her, so the answer is obviously no.”

“You’re forgetting about Constable Stick-Up-His-Butt,” the dwarf said in a sing-song voice.

“Don’t call Ser Gilmore that, no matter how much it may be true,” he said, a tiny traitorous hint of a smirk curving one corner of his mouth. As quickly as it had appeared, it vanished. “And certainly do _not _tell anyone about this mission. Not even the Commander.”

“Why not? One would think she’d be all for this. She _hates_ having people killed. Blackmail is a fun alternative.”

“Because the Commander’s husband wants this to stay a secret for now, a thing to keep in his back pocket in case any of these problematic nobles act up. Again,” he replied.

“Since when does Zev have any authority over us? He’s not a Warden. Officially, anyhow.”

“Since we have the same objective: Not letting any of these noble arseholes make another attempt on the Commander’s life, who just so happens to be his wife?” he said with an arched brow.

“I guess that’s as good a reason as any. Hey, keep a lookout for me, I won’t be long!” She scurried down the ladder to her left and tiptoed her way toward the Chantry.

“Where are you g-- Maker’s arse.” He sighed raggedly as he witnessed his accomplice pull out a hammer and nail and begin tapping. He favored her with a glare when she returned. “Did you seriously have to nail the woman’s breast band to the Chanter’s board, Sigrun?”

“Have to? No. Want to? Yes! Also, you didn’t notice that I grabbed her lover’s smalls, too? They’re right next to it, the black silky --”

“I noticed,” he hissed, rubbing the bridge of his nose. “And I wish to the Maker that I hadn’t. What sort of man wears a thong, anyway?”

“Bann Carolyne’s lover, apparently,” the dwarf answered with a cheeky grin.

Nathaniel shook his head and muttered, gazing up toward the pair of half-moons in the sky. “Come on, our next target’s across the city. The city guard will be patrolling near here in a few minutes. Let’s get gone while the getting’s good. I know for a fact Sevarra would save them the trouble and interrogate us herself if we were caught.”

“So you _do_ remember her name!” his fellow Warden teased.

They darted down one alley and up the next one. They climbed up the side of the city’s bell tower and began crawling from roof to roof from there. Eventually, they reached an estate with lavish gardens and wrought iron fencing surrounding it. A quick jog led them to a side gate whose lock proved to be simple.

“Now, seriously, we need to be quiet here. I hear the Murnet family keep mabari that are trained to kill. We get the stuff and we get out. We won’t have time to go stealing their smalls.”

“_Fine,_” the dwarf sighed. “Have it your way, killjoy.”


End file.
